A mountain hangover can be a terrible thing. You’ve checked the forecast (there’s fresh pow), you’ve waxed up your skis, made it through the coach and you’re ready to tear up the mountain.
Except one thing – you’ve got a vague recollection of one too many beers, wines, Jaegerbombs and Joss shots and now you’re body isn’t playing ball. Someone is playing the drums in your skull and your stomach is doing more backflips than you ever thought were possible. But fear not - it can be beaten! An Alpine hangover isn’t actually that different to a normal hangover, the prospect of skiing just gives you ten times more motivation to beat it! With these tips you’ll be up, out and skiing in no time.
The night before
Like any hangover, the path to victory begins the night before. If you made a kilo of pasta for your mates but opted for a liquid dinner, eat a bowl before bed to soak it up. The same goes for water – there’s nothing worse than waking up with a mouth like the Sahara then playing an unwelcome game of gin or no gin trying to find plain old H20.
The morning after
When you've managed to extract yourself from the multiple layers of confusing bedsheet/blanket setup that got drunkenly improvised, as well as whatever fancy dress you fell asleep in, your mind jumps to one thing: coffee. But hold off – that rush of caffeine will perk you up, but coffee is a diuretic and there’s nothing worse than having to buy a €3 Mars bar just to use the loo on the slopes. Instead, go for a rehydration sachet to get all those essential electrolytes back into your body.
As soon as everyone is out of their bed and stumbling around, it’s prime time to throw some fresh air and natural light into the mix. Pull back those curtains, step onto the balcony and enjoy that mountain air (or an early morning cigarette, depending on your preference). Now’s the perfect time to do your personal weather survey and scope out your runs. And, if you’re feeling like starting the day as you mean to go on, it's time for stubby number one.
The urge to get out and on the slopes may be great but as your mum probably warned you, breakfast is the most important meal of the day. This advice only gets more relevant in resort. When you’ve got a full day of shredding and après dancing ahead of you, munching a singular pain au chocolat on the first chair won’t cut it. Dig out that frying pan from last night’s washing up, clear the stubbies off the table and have a proper breakfast.
Get down to the nearest shop, grab yourself some baguettes and throw together a morning feast. We’re talking sausages, eggs, bacon, the lot. You’ll be glad later that you’re not that guy stopping the whole group 2 hours in to grab some overpriced food from a mountain café.
On the slopes
Once you’re fed, hydrated, and you’ve finally located all your gear in the bomb site that is your apartment, now it’s time to actually get on the slopes. Having spent the last fortnight telling everyone within earshot that you’re definitely the best skier on the mountain, you might be tempted to head straight to that Olympic downhill course, or those red kickers you’ve scoped out. As great as the temptation may be, it’s always a good shout to ease yourself in a little bit, get those ski legs back. And as much as you may not want to admit, everyone really loves those cruisy blues.
Once you’re up and moving, it's time to throw on some tunes. Everyone has their skiing favourite, whether it's channelling your inner Henrik Harlaut with Wu-Tang or feeling wavy with some Flume, music is key to getting your head in the game.
Ready to go?
Although you may not make first lift with these steps, you’ll definitely be in good shape to conquer the mountain when you’re up and out. And of course if the hangover’s just not budging, and the crisp Alpine air just isn’t doing it for you, après probably isn’t too far away.